Wired but Tired: When Your Body Runs on Stress Chemistry
(And why “pushing through” stops working)
If you feel exhausted but can’t switch off… you’re not imagining it.
This “wired but tired” pattern is one of the most common reasons women come to see me. On the outside, you’re functioning. You’re getting things done. You’re holding it together.
But inside, your body feels like it’s running on emergency power.
And here’s the key point: you can’t keep scaling your life on stress chemistry.
It works… until it doesn’t.
What “wired but tired” usually looks like
You might relate to some of these:
- You’re tired all day, then “wake up” at night
- Your mind won’t slow down when you get into bed
- You wake around 2–3am and struggle to get back to sleep
- You rely on coffee to function and sugar to get through the afternoon
- You feel snappy, sensitive, or emotionally brittle
- Your body feels heavy, but your brain is still racing
- Your digestion is off (bloating, reflux, constipation, nausea)
- Your cycle symptoms are more intense than they used to be
This isn’t a personality flaw. It’s a physiology pattern.
What’s actually happening (in plain language)
Your nervous system has two main gears:
- Sympathetic = “go mode” (fight/flight, alert, productive, driven)
- Parasympathetic = “restore mode” (digest, repair, sleep, rebuild)
When life has been demanding for too long — work stress, parenting load, emotional strain, under-sleeping, under-eating, over-caffeinating — your body gets trained into staying in go-mode.
So even when you’re deeply tired, your system is still scanning for the next thing.
That’s why the classic advice “just relax” doesn’t work.
Because your body isn’t choosing this — it’s running an old survival program.
Why pushing through makes it worse (even if you’re strong)
High-capacity women are excellent at one thing: functioning through discomfort.
But “wired but tired” is your body’s way of saying:
“I can’t keep funding your life at this pace without consequences.”
When you keep pushing, you reinforce the stress pattern:
- More adrenaline/cortisol signalling
- More sleep disruption
- More blood sugar swings
- More inflammation and digestive disruption
- More hormone sensitivity (PMS/perimenopause symptoms often feel louder)
It becomes a loop:
stress → poor sleep → poorer resilience → more stress
The goal isn’t to stop being driven.
It’s to rebuild your capacity so you can lead your life without white-knuckling it.
What helps (without adding 20 new “routines”)
Here are the most effective first steps I use in clinic — simple, realistic, and designed for women who already have a lot on their plate.
1) Choose one “downshift cue” every evening
Your body needs a consistent signal that says: we’re safe to come down now.
Pick one (not five):
- a hot shower
- 10 minutes stretching
- herbal tea
- magnesium glycinate (if suitable)
- a short walk after dinner
- dim lights for the last hour before bed
Consistency matters more than intensity.
2) Stabilise blood sugar (this is huge for wired nights)
A surprising number of 2–3am wake-ups are linked to overnight blood sugar dips — especially in stressed, under-fuelled women.
Try:
- dinner with protein + vegetables + healthy fats
- a small protein-based snack if you wake hungry (or trial it before bed for a week)
- reduce the “coffee only until lunchtime” rule if it means you’re under-eating
You don’t need perfection. You need stability.
3) Caffeine audit (no shame, just strategy)
If your body is already running on stress chemistry, caffeine can keep the loop going.
Instead of “quit coffee,” try:
- delay your first coffee by 60–90 minutes after waking
- cap at 1–2 coffees
- swap the second coffee for a decaf or a herbal alternative
- add protein at breakfast so coffee isn’t your fuel
This is about capacity — not punishment.
4) Make your mornings do some of the heavy lifting
To sleep better, you often need to teach the body what daytime is.
Try:
- 5–10 minutes outside in natural light early in the day
- movement before screens (even 5 minutes counts)
- protein at breakfast
You’re not trying to build an Instagram routine — you’re giving your nervous system a map.
5) Consider targeted support (not a supplement avalanche)
Depending on your symptoms, a tailored plan can include:
- nervous system herbs
- magnesium/theanine-type support
- digestive support if reflux/bloating is part of your stress picture
- iron/B12 or thyroid review if fatigue is persistent
- functional testing only when it changes the plan
The right support should make you feel more like yourself, not more overwhelmed.
When it’s time to get help (a gentle guide)
If any of these are true, it’s worth getting personalised support:
- You’ve been wired but tired for months
- Sleep is regularly broken (especially 2–3am waking)
- Anxiety symptoms feel new or escalated
- You’re relying on caffeine, sugar, alcohol or sleep aids to regulate
- Your cycle symptoms have changed significantly
- You feel “functional” but not okay
You don’t have to wait for a full crash to take this seriously.
FAQs
1) Is wired but tired the same as burnout?
It can be part of burnout, but it’s more specific: your body is exhausted while your nervous system stays switched on. Burnout is the broader picture of depleted capacity over time.
2) Why do I wake at 2–3am?
Common drivers include stress signalling, blood sugar dips overnight, histamine load, reflux, hormone shifts (especially perimenopause), and a nervous system that hasn’t downshifted.
3) How long does it take to improve?
Some women notice small shifts in days to weeks (especially sleep rhythm). Deeper capacity restoration usually takes longer — think in phases, not quick fixes.
4) Do I need functional testing?
Not always. Testing is useful when symptoms are stubborn, complex, or don’t match basic patterns. The goal is to use testing only when it changes the plan.
Ready for a clear plan?
If you’re stuck in the wired-but-tired loop, I can help you map what’s driving it and build a realistic plan that fits your life.
